I am so petrified of being alone
That I ensure it.
Not letting anyone near
Enough to hurt me
And pushing those who try away.
Not allowing myself to care
For anyone
Everyone is but an acquaintance
All knowing a different person.
I hide myself so well I transform daily.
My acting is noteworthy,
To onlookers I appear sane
Happy even.
My heart is untouched
Bleak and ignored
Only present to keep me alive
Which is why I forsake it.
I want only to be dead
To end this misery
But relentlessly I continue to breathe
Dead seems so much better than alone.
